Columns and why I can't write them

I love when blogs have weekly columns that follow a theme. Maybe Friday they share Photos, or Monday they share a new recipe, Tuesdays are photoshop tips. Sadly, I don't have any real specialties. I dabble in many things, but master none, sort of excuse. I could have a weekly "Where's Waldo" type column where I hunt for my lost portable house phone (Where's the phone?)but that would demand taking photos of my house, in which I seem capable of maintaining a front room ready only rule.

Instead I thought I'd share with you some helpful reviews on people I know. To keep it interesting, I'll do it whenever I want, rather than tie myself down to something as predictable as a week. Now...whomever should my first victim subject be.

Mary. Who lives in the Lethbridge area and may or may not be accepting applications for friendship.

I've known my friend Mary for about 16 years. Mary and I have walked the backroads of Penticton for long hours having interesting discussions about music, Ireland and the band U2, of which she is a strong advocate for. She doesn't mind sharing bathrooms with strangers and if you can get past her many and varied opinions, is quite the loveliest and loyal of friends.

Mary is married to Kim, who is a man, and they have a growing family. Kim delivers their children at home, without the aid of drugs, nurses, or insurance companies. Mary is quite confident in her own abilities to birth as well as her husbands abilities to support her and any situation that may arise in the process. Mary also goes to the gym the day after she gives birth.

Mary does things she cannot recall in the middle of the night. I once found her at a sliding door in the middle of the night, yelling the name of her sister. In the morning she had no recollection of the event. You might think seeing a ghost would be a scary event, hands down, watching Mary do this was scarier, not to mention louder. I have no doubt that Mary has the ability to achieve whatever she sets her mind to do.

Pros
Smart
Fit
Healthy
Good birther

Cons
Opinionated
Thinks "Janie Mack" is a swear
Sunburns easily
Husbands name is Kim

Conclusion: She still likes me even though I would never let my own husband or her husband deliver my child. She's one of the kindest and most compassionate women I have ever known.

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