Beeps



At any given time there are "beeps" going off in our home. The culprit is usually coming from Russyl's work Blackberry. He works with early birds and night owls and it is not uncommon for the thing to beep after 11pm and as early as 5:30am. Clearly, he works with people who could party with vampires.

Now most of you know that I am the ears in this relationship and all sounds, squawks, sobs, bumps, buzzes, creaks and commotions fall under my designation. I like to think of this as one of the many perks Russ received when he married me, or part of his Eternal Benefits Plan. Whereas Russ has provided me with an eternity of lawn mowing, snow removal, and woodworking, my job is to listen.

I really am quite good at what I do. There was one night where we heard this loud crash and I described it as someone throwing a shopping cart over our fence at the side of the house. Well, the next day upon investigation, something had been tossed over our fence but it wasn't a shopping cart, it was a bicycle. Still, I was rather impressed with my ears.

I digress...beeps. Occassionally the "beep" has been the bemoaning blurts of a dying cell phone. I don't know how a cell phone has the capacity to sound unloved and neglected by making a beep, but let me assure you that ours do. Well, the other morning around 5 am I was greeted with a "beep". It sounded new. Perhaps it was the sound of the Blackberry dying, I thought. But that was questioned when the busy beeping sounds of Russ getting an email were made.

I just couldn't figure out what the heck was making this beeping. So I got out of bed. I checked all the cell phones, all the portable phones, the video game devices, the electronics in Russyl's study. It was clearly coming from this area, but I could not for the life of me find it. Then I looked up. A smoke alarm, and it was loudly proclaiming the hour of it's death.

I have lived in this house for almost 4 years. I have painted every surface in this place and I have never...NOT ONCE...ever known or seen or registered that there was a smoke detector on the lower level. Seriously, never. Russ and I had purchase 3 new smoke detectors for the house and 2 fire extinguishers just the other day. Maybe this was one that he had already installed. I would ask him.

"That smoke alarm you installed has been driving me crazy since 5 this morning," I state as he gets out of the shower. Okay so I didn't so much ask him...

"I never installed any smoke alarm yet."

"Well there is a fire alarm slash (yes I even said slash) smoke detector that is dying downstairs," though I know that it still has some juice in it as I set it off for a bit trying to get the battery out, unsuccessfully, I might add.

"Show me," so off we go down two flights of stairs to the culprit of the beeping.

And I swear to you, dear reader, that he had never before seen this device either. Neither of us knew it exsisted! I have walked by that thing at least 2000 times and never once realized it was there. What is up with that? I'm baffled. A part of me still thinks he just set up the whole thing to make me get of bed and make him a sandwich for work.

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